Phil Clark – a U.S. Air National Guard veteran and former NFL football player – was bullied as a child because he stuttered.

Growing up shy, poor and with a speech impediment in a small town outside Cincinnati, Ohio, he rarely spoke and didn’t want anyone to speak to him, he said.

“I didn’t step out too often,” the 80-year-old Crystal Lake resident said. “I didn’t want to be seen.”

But as life unfolded, he found his voice through experiences, people, meditation and creative visualization, and today helps others find theirs.

Clark attended Northwestern University on sports scholarships, earning a degree in finance. He was drafted by the Dallas Cowboys right out of college in 1967. In 1970, he played for the Chicago Bears. In the off seasons, he served in the 126th Air Refueling Wing of the Air National Guard during Vietnam, from 1967 to 1973.

Meditation has been a thread woven through much of his life, helping him slow down his thinking and focus on the positive. He learned to use his “whole brain, instead of just the left side as we are all programmed to do as children,” he said.

While in the military, which he said “really, really helped” him, he “learned about discipline and what they called authority.”

He was an older college graduate living with younger Guardsmen, just out of high school – some who “didn’t want to obey” orders to keep their dorms tidy, he recalled.

When they wouldn’t follow orders, their sergeant would make them do pushups and sit-ups, and “the guys would get so angry,” he said. But Clark would tell them “just follow the rules.” He also led groups of Guardsmen in military cadence.

His leadership skills were noticed, and Clark was made the dorm chief.

“I was honored,” he said. “It just felt amazing. Here I am, 50 people listening to me, [when] I grew up not talking to anyone.“

While at Northwestern, a music professor noticed Clark’s stutter. Rather than coddle him, she “forced” him to sing in the glee club’s barbershop quartet. He recalled that when an instrument failed during a play, he improvised and sang the part, which the audience thought was part of the show.

While working in the life insurance business, which Clark described as “another stepping stone,” he was taught how to talk to clients. He memorized a lengthy company sales pitch, which he used to land appointments and secure sales, resulting in a successful 20-year career.

“I was in the right place at right time, and in the right groups a lot, and it all taught me, practice. Practice makes perfect,” Clark said.

He recalled when the Cowboys’ head coach Tom Landry asked him to be the main speaker at a convention. Clark began nervously speaking at the podium, reading from the 10 or so pages he’d written out. But he said he “got real comfortable, so I walked away from the podium. When he realized he’d left his written pages behind, he said there was a quick flash of panic, but then “everything went fine.”

He attributed the success of that speech to meditation and Landry’s teachings as a coach, to focus on what it is the players as individuals had to do in a game.

Landry would make players watch recordings of football games and memorize how the opposing team played. He would then test the players every Saturday, and if they did not get 90% of the questions correct, they did not play Sunday, Clark said. Landry taught players not to worry about what their teammates were going to do in a game, but to focus on what they were going to do.

“It’s all about getting back to yourself,” Clark said. “It meant you knew what you had to do on the field and what your responsibilities were.” As human beings that is “our main purpose. You don’t have to worry about what anybody else is responsible for.”

Clark said he’s followed Landry’s approach and practiced meditation daily since his late 20s. It has “kept moving me forward. I learned about meditation and self development and I said, ‘This is my journey.’”

Meditation, Clark said, works because it slows the brain down, takes the brain out of autopilot and allows access to the subconscious.

“It helps get me out of my way, and it doesn’t mean things are easy. I’m still going through all my stuff, but the best is yet to come.”

In recent years, he has volunteered at various places in Crystal Lake including The Dole, The Break teen center and most recently Veterans Path to Hope.

Clark has spoken to groups of children including those “labeled” as having Attention Deficit Disorder, he said. He begins by telling the children he is honored to be there with them. He says “You’ve got a very, very special gift, you’re multi-talented, but you are trying to find the one perfect thing, and I’m here to tell you, you can do it all. The key is to know that and accept that and then focus ... on [your talents] one at a time.”

Kassie Nettleton, a peer support specialist at Veterans Path To Hope, said Clark greets everyone “with a warm smile, a kind word and steady reassurance that none of us are alone.”

“He starts talking with anybody who comes in,” she said. “A lot of people are dealing with really heavy things when they come in, and he is able to start a conversation, be a warm reassuring presence in our office.”

He tells people having a hard time that “‘this is one part of your life, you are going to get back up and do great things.’ He does that for everybody that comes in,” Nettleton said.

She said learning about Clark’s life, personal challenges and resilience is “a privilege.”

“Today, he’s a living testament to what our organization can be for veterans in need. [He offers] wisdom, calm, and community to everyone he meets,” Nettleton said. “I say this with the highest compliment: Phil has the quiet grace of Mister Rogers and the heart of a gentle giant.”

Brenda Napholz, president and founder of The Break, said Clark helped with activities, mentored the teens and at a Halloween celebration he was the fortune teller.

“He shared whatever gifts he had,” Napholz said. He is very humble, very caring. ... He is such a big guy, a football guy, but he is just a gentle giant that works so hard.”

In 2022, the Break honored Clark with the Volunteer of the Year Award at its inaugural Bear Down with the Break Tailgate event.

Clark said he meditates twice a day and pays attention to his positive self talk throughout the day. Though life hasn’t been easy, he said he still focuses on moving toward his hopes and dreams.

“It’s been quite the journey,” he said. “I’m still moving forward.”