McCarty family shares story after tragedy

Of all the pieces of the legacy Patricia and Wayne McCarty left behind, perhaps the Bradley couple’s most memorable impressions were the ones involving wheels – whether it happened to be three wheels or four.

Every morning, regardless of the weather, Patricia would ride to St. Joseph’s Catholic Church on her trademark yellow tricycle, the same bike her kids and grandkids have fond memories of riding in the rear basket when they were young.

Patricia would also carry with her a book containing the names of anyone going through a hard time she intended to pray for at church.

But the most treasured transportation for the McCartys, who owned McCarty & Sons Automatic Transmission shop in Bradley for 30 years, was a black 1956 Ford Thunderbird, or T-bird.

Patricia bought the vehicle to surprise Wayne for their first anniversary in 1957.

They drove the T-bird on their honeymoon. They drove it around California when Wayne served in the National Guard. They drove it to watch the early Daytona 500 races. It has been kept in pristine condition over the years.

“That was his consistency,” noted grandson Alex Digiacomo. “That car was like, ‘I’m keeping this car forever.’ ”

Patricia wasn’t the only one to write things down. Wayne had kept a list of perhaps 30 cars he owned throughout his life.

With a passion for automobiles that he’s passed down to many of his descendants, Wayne’s memory was sharp when it came to cars he had driven and the details of any antique cars he came across.

Unimaginable loss

It is that consistency, Patricia and Wayne, 88 and 89 years old, respectively, always seemed to maintain – from their simple routines to their love for their family and their faith in God – that now gives their loved ones some comfort as they navigate an unimaginable loss.

Patricia and Wayne, who had seven children, 11 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren with one more on the way, were shot and killed by their 61-year-old son, Michael, who then died by suicide, on June 30, 2025.

The incident was the beginning of a complex journey filled with complicated emotions for the rest of the family.

After funeral services were held Monday, members of the family gathered Tuesday in the Bourbonnais home of one of the McCarty siblings and shared where they are with grief and healing in an interview with the Daily Journal.

With dozens of pictures from Patricia and Wayne’s seven decades together compiled for the memorial, they also reflected on some of the good times they are keeping close to their hearts as they move forward.

Family members also noted the immense gratitude they have for the community for all of the support and prayers that have been extended.

Good memories

Wayne and Patricia were married for 69 years and together for 73 years.

Their love story goes back to meeting in second grade at St. Joseph School in Bradley.

They started dating in eighth grade, on Valentine’s Day, 1952.

Their wedding anniversary, May 12, 1956, was always special. Patricia would don her wedding dress every year on the date and pose for a family photo.

Other holidays were just as meaningful in the McCarty home.

It didn’t matter how many birthdays were in the family at the same time; everyone got their own “happy birthday” tune sung to them. Achievements were recognized in the same fashion, with a song, and always ended in a prayer.

Wayne and Patricia would visit family, see a car show and feed the birds on the beach in Florida every Thanksgiving while they were still able to travel.

Christmas and New Year’s Eve were big deals as well.

Patricia orchestrated a family play about the birth of Jesus every Christmas, with each family member taking on a character and wearing a costume.

On New Year’s Eve, the same party supplies would come out every year to get the kids excited for the countdown.

Racing tradition

Wayne’s older brother, Cal, had been the one to convince Wayne to go to school to study transmissions and open up his own business.

Patricia was naturally good with numbers and budgeting and was the bookkeeper for the family business. They both demonstrated the importance of a strong work ethic early on in their children’s lives.

Cal also had influenced Wayne to start racing stock cars, with Wayne winning a championship race in 1961.

Wayne continued to race once he had children, eventually passing the tradition on to his sons and grandsons.

There has been a McCarty at the Kankakee County Speedway for many years.

Wayne was there to see his grandson, Austin McCarty, snag one last win for the family on the Friday before he passed away.

The next week, on July 4, Austin returned to the track, and though his car was falling apart, he made it across the finish line, picking up another win in the pro late model feature, his fourth in a row.

Austin believes Wayne was there in spirit, helping him hold it together, both literally and figuratively.

“I was a little choked up, but it was more of a comforting feeling that all the stress from thinking about it was over with,” he said. “It was emotional, but it was needed. It was cool to be able to get a win like that, and for him to be around for my first championship.”

Moving forward

Granddaughter Kiki Parker said that how consistent her grandparents were in life has helped her to deal with their sudden deaths.

“What’s helped me is knowing exactly what they would want us to do in everything that we’ve done,” Kiki said. “Sticking together as a family, being the glue for each other, because they were the glue for the whole family.”

Steve McCarty, the McCartys’ son, said that how well the family has made difficult decisions in the wake of tragedy is a testament to his parents’ influence.

“We’ve all worked together and there’s not been a harsh word,” Steve said. “There’s misunderstandings, but we got through them. We got through the most difficult time you could imagine.”

Julie McCarty, Steve’s wife, said that she sees the journey they’ve all been on as floating together out in the ocean, riding waves of grief.

“A wave will come; maybe it gets us all at one time or it gets us individually. We tumble in the water. We all stand up. We’re all still hanging on to each other. We walk out. Then we get smacked by another wave,” Julie said. “It’s a continuous journey of grief that we can’t understand, but we all are here for each other, hanging onto each other and making sure we all get up and we don’t let go.”

Diana Digiacomo, the McCartys’ daughter, said the family has been struggling to process the traumatic way in which Wayne and Patricia died while also grieving the loss of Michael.

The goal has been to let everyone know they are safe to express themselves, as there are no wrong feelings.

“The turbulence is the dark place, is going, ‘Why, what was he thinking?’ Going into envisioning his bad choice,” Diana said. “You’ve got to go there, but you’ve got to get out. Get back out of the turbulence, then what you’re looking for is that flat, beautiful ocean. That peace.”

Feelings can differ on a day-to-day basis, she said. And that is OK.

“We’re all in different parts of grief,” Diana said. “Some of us are angry, naturally. The next day, you’re forgiving, you’re remembering the happy memories of our very loving brother or uncle, and son.”

Teresa Johnson, the McCartys’ daughter, noted that she and Michael helped to take care of their parents, with him fixing things around the house.

“That is where it’s also very confusing in people’s minds, how did this come to be?” Teresa said. “You can never understand what’s in people’s minds unless you’re walking in their shoes. He was not a bad person.”

Family members also expressed how much they are prioritizing the mental health of themselves and one another, now and going forward.

“There’s a lot of moods across every single person, but more than anything, mental health has to be the most important thing that comes out of this,” said grandson Patrick McCarty. “Everybody fights it; learn to find what you need to move forward. Lean on people. There’s so many people in this family. Find the one you can do that with.”

In one of her hand-written notes to her grandchildren – with parts underlined in different colored crayons, as was her signature – Patricia shared some of her seemingly endless words of wisdom, which the family is remembering now.

“God does not give you what you can handle,” Patricia wrote. “God helps you handle what you were given.”